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Fiction-writers say that characters sometimes take on a life of their own and “tell” the writer what to put down on the page. Apparently, this is also true of non-fiction.
The nine women in my upcoming book are real. They are friends and important acquaintances, not interviewees. This is a story of how each relationship started, unfolded, and took on a life of its own.
I started “collecting” my wisdom whisperers when I was 46. My first, a woman I met in a fiction-writing class, Henrietta, is 78, “ancient” in my youth-culture eyes. Luckily, I am curious and pay attention instead of giving into my bias against “old.” Henrietta is legally blind and walks with I cane but takes classes all over the city. She has qualities I hope to have when I am “that old.”
I eventually find other “good” much older friends wherever I go. Each is different; each has something I (unknowingly) need. It’s not that they share “the secret.” They simply live energetically, proudly, and well. They work on being independent, responsible, and engaged in life. Much to everyone’s dismay, I begin to call them “my old ladies” and soon refer to myself that way!
I finished this book six weeks after my 80th birthday and came to a wonderful conclusion: being an old lady (at least the way I mean it) keeps me young.
If you’re on the younger side of the age divide, reading The Wisdom Whisperers will inspire you to befriend admirable old people who cross your path. If you already have older friends, perhaps you’ll cherish them a bit more.
If you’re on the other side of that divide — my side — I hope you’ll give yourself permission to be a kick-ass old person whom youngers notice and emulate. I speak from experience; it’s a terrific feeling!
Trust me, this not another book about “aging well.” It’s about living and picking relationships that prepare you and widen your options. It’s about embracing your years — no matter what they bring — and seeing aging as a gift that not everyone gets to unwrap.
(Oh, and feel free to invite me to your book club!)
The Buzz: What “they” say About the book…
The Wisdom Whisperers is about the boundless opportunities that unfold when we dare to look beyond age as a limiting factor. But don’t take my word for it. Read what is already being said about the book:
“In a disconnected world, Melinda offers a simple yet rarely considered solution: make friendships with much-older people. This book artfully suggests these unlikely bonds could cure generational loneliness, bridge cultural divides and maybe even make the world a kinder place. Given many of us will be living in this world longer than ever, it’s hard to imagine a more urgently needed message.”
— Rohit Bhargava, Bestselling author and founder of Non-Obvious Company
“In a world where people expect the worst in old age, Melinda Blau brings us the best. As a master story-teller, Blau draws on the voices of her “old ladies” to evoke the triumph of late life and lives well-lived. We are all growing older, and this book provides the inspiration to do it well.”
— Karen Fingerman, PhD, Professor of Human Development & Family Sciences and Director, Texas Aging & Longevity Consortium
“Melinda Blau’s ‘The Wisdom Whisperers’ unlocks the secrets to a fulfilling life of resilience, grace, and laughter. Through poignant stories about her friendships with women in the last phase of their lives she shares timeless wisdom and inspires readers to embrace life’s challenges with grit and humor.”
— Ellen Langer, PhD, author of The Mindful Body: Thinking Our Way to Chronic Health
“Melinda Blau proposes a refreshing and virtuous perspective on ‘growing up’—something that I might have erroneously called ‘growing old’ before I read The Wisdom Whisperers. In a world of extremes that often affords an unbalanced importance to youth, Melinda proposes an antidote and a convincing path towards opportunities for health and happiness by sharing the wisdom that aging—and engaging—affords us. This book serves as a valuable treasure map, leading us along a trail abundant with riches but easily accessible. As the Baby Whisperer established a framework for nurturing my children, The Wisdom Whisperers is lucid and profound insight into a form of self-care through connection and friendship as we navigate the aging process. Melinda’s personal and intimate approach resonates with significance… an affirmation of life!”
—Daniel Rose, Michelin-star chef, Le Coucou, New York City, La Bourse et la Vie, Paris
“The Wisdom Whisperers is a tonic for the soul. And best of all, the powerful ingredients of Melinda Blau’s life-affirming elixir: good older friends who fill our lives and fuel our spirits—are within everyone’s grasp.”
—Sheila Weller, author of Girls Like Us: Carole King, Joni Mitchell, Carly Simon & the Journey of a Generation
“Ms. Blau says ‘everything around us shouts that old is BAD. True. And pernicious. We live down to the expectation that creates. Ms. Blau—with her collection of stories about amazingly upbeat and happy ‘old ladies’—offers us a fine antidote.”
—Chris Crowley, co-author of the Younger Next Year books.
“A gorgeous exploration of the power of relationships and how a lifetime of seeking wisdom through the generations can enrich our own experience. Blau’s book shares its wisdom with a deftness and style that is comfortable, authentic, and meaningful. Read this book. Meet these women. It is worth the ride.”
—Jeff Hamaoui, Co-Founder, Modern Elder Academy
“A visionary perspective on adult friendship between young-old and old-old friends. Blau’s warm, engaging stories treat readers to insights about deeply personal and meaningful relationships. I wish I could visit with these ‘grandfriends’ and bask in their energy, enthusiasm, encouragement, and inspiration!”
—Rosemary Blieszner, PhD, Alumni Distinguished Professor Emerita of Human Development and Family Science, Virginia Tech.
“It’s humbling to see words of joy and aging in the same paragraph and feel my heart weep for joy. Melinda Blau’s book reminds me I always believed I was one day going to die. I just didn’t believe it would happen in this lifetime… I wish this book a long life and treasured impact on the lives of oh so many.”
—Leah Komaiko, author of Be the Story You’re Here to Tell and Am I Old Yet?