Melinda Blau

Writer, Speaker, Social Observer

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You are here: Home / Blog / Pandemic (Comic) Relief: Author Unknown

Pandemic (Comic) Relief: Author Unknown

May 7, 2020 by Melinda Blau

I know that many “lists” circulate on Facebook and via email.  This one came to me from a friend in Paris.  Unfortunately, the author is unknown.  Some of her (?) one-liners made think and most made me “laugh out loud.”  Can’t we all use a good laugh just about now?

  

Can we uninstall 2020 and reinstall it again?… I think it has a virus …

Just asked a 6-year-old if he understands why there is no school. He said yes because they are out of toilet paper.

On the bright side, I am no longer calling this shelter-in-place. I am an artist-in-residence.

After years of wanting to thoroughly clean my house but lacking the time, this week I discovered that wasn’t the reason.

You’re not stuck at home, you’re safe at home. One word can change your attitude and one cough can change your life.

If you thought toilet paper was crazy … just wait until 300 million people all want a haircut appointment.

2020 is a unique Leap Year. It has 29 days in February, 300 days in March and 5 years in April.

Wearing a mask inside your home is now highly recommended Not so much to prevent COVID-19 but to stop eating.

This cleaning with alcohol is total b.s. NOTHING gets done after that first bottle.

Does anyone know if we can take showers yet or should we just keep washing our hands???

You think it’s bad now? In 20 years our country will be run by people homeschooled by day drinkers….

My Mom always told me I wouldn’t accomplish anything by laying in the bed all day, but look at me now! I’m saving the world.

I miss the days when we were terrified of Romaine lettuce. Ahh, the good times….

I swear my fridge just said: “what the hell do you want now?”

Whoever owes you money, go to their house now. They should be home.

Homeschooling Day #3: they all graduated. #Done.

 

If you know the source or author’s name, please share it in the comments section. If not, I hope you enjoyed the comic relief!

 

 

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Comments

  1. Gregg says

    May 7, 2020 at 10:34 am

    I just read this after finishing your grudge blog. Talk about balance!
    Actually, it can be quite helpful to use a bit of humor when dealing with grudges.

  2. Bert says

    May 7, 2020 at 10:53 am

    Made me laugh. Very good stuff at at a very needed time. Thank you!

  3. Cay says

    May 7, 2020 at 1:02 pm

    LOL!!! Thank you whoever you are for coming up with these funny one liners …and thanks for sharing them, Melinda!

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